Good and Bad, Mostly Bad, Ways to Fill Your Empty Soul: #25 Be Abducted by Aliens

Be Abducted by Aliens

alien abduction

What it Entails:

Drugs. Lots and lots of drugs.

Wait? You were expecting real instructions? Okay. Fine.

Think like an alien. You’re observing a (comparatively) low-tech civilization and want to collect specimens for study/tests/dissection, but don’t want to be discovered. Who are you going to choose? People without personal connections, people who aren’t going to be missed.

How does that help you?

You need to become an attractive abductee. Quit your job. Break your lease. Sell your home. Sever connections with family and friends. Move to a new city or country. Spend all of your time alone, preferably in the unobserved wilderness. Wear lots of shiny silver clothing, you want society to think you’re nuts, but to stand out to the (potential) aliens.

Keep this up for a minimum of 25 years.

Pros:
1. Probable lack of social contact.
2. Silver clothing is officially “In.”
3. Potentially answer the question of “Are we alone.”

Cons:
1. Unlikely to succeed.
2. May accidentally be exposed to interesting people and cultures due to travel.
3. Chance of dissection.

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