Good and Bad, Mostly Bad, Ways to Fill Your Empty Soul: #3 Teach Your Friends How to Cook!

Teach Your Friends How to Cook!

What it Entails:
By this point in time you’ve learned how to cook and mastered the art of acquiring the kitchen tools you need from those around you. It is essential that you have several good recipes that make use of esoteric cooking items. I recommend an industrial raclette grill, a wood-fired pizza oven and a candy thermometer. These are all items that will not be found in your average friend’s kitchen.

Teach your friends how to make exquisite dishes with them. Raclette, pizza, and candies or deep fried goodness. Lace these dishes with intense quantities of caffeine to get them addicted. Stop making them.

Let the agony build in your friends until they need these dishes again. Let them come over and cook them for you. Every fifth dish or so secretly spike it with that caffeine that they so crave.

Pros:
1. Now you have kitchen minions!
2. More time to go back to theft and skulking, darks hobbies that you are now addicted to from your time left learning how to cook.
3. No more grocery bills as your friends bring over ingredients.

Cons:
1. Must teach friends how to cook.
2. Must spend time with people.
3. Criminal enterprises at risk of discovery due to extra human contact.

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